His "Blarsted Midwife"

THE “housewife,” the handy outfit for soldiers (especially handy for those at Islands stations, where clothes are often in sad need of repair) is an article highly prized by the troops.

This happened at a kit inspection on an Islands station in the early days of the Pacific . war. All hands were stand ing at attention, with their kits before them, when the officer inspecting came to a man on his knees, hurriedly turning over the different articles of his kit.

“What’s the matter?” the officer queried.

“Sorry, sir!” the soldier answered.

“Some (indescribable) cow has pinched me blarsted midwife!”